So, today? I've been incorporating many of his suggestions. He greatly improved my Illyria voice, and gave me a reason for the initial assault on the Hellmouth other than "getting their asses kicked."
Now, whether I'm going to take it down from where it's posted and repost it (which, I believe, is something like three or four different places)...that's an open question. However, I registered at Twisting the Hellmouth yesterday, and I have a shiny new crossover comm (jossverse_xover), so I'll probably post it in those two places anyway, and stick a link here.
So, Alix...your beta wasn't in vain. It just took me while to get to it. And I can't tell you how much I appreciate you taking the time to do it. Thanks!